Crazy
Think of the most impact-ful, global-effecting events which have taken place to this point in 2007. If you immediately start thinking of the release of the iPhone, LED TV’s, Vista, Ghost Rider, Quantum Comps, Snakes on a Plane DVD, Taste Of Chaos Tour or if you even think of such vast impacting things as Senator Clinton’s Presidential ambitions or even the re-design of Fruit Roll-ups you have it all wrong, dead wrong.
Elgor, son of Arthos, son of Bametrix, Son of Maximus Decimis Surealist has summoned us all for the reckoning, or rather just to tell us that the one of America’s lowest life forms has now gone absolutely nuts. We knew she was crazy back when she married someone who was absolutely white trash, “Life comes at you fast K-Fed” and then actually had two kids with him. We most definitely thought she belonged in a turd farm when she repeatedly admits going to rehab centers (even while pregnant), or when she threw up all over herself in a club. For everyone who hates the pop world and everything it represents, she has been someone we make fun of, maybe not as much as Jessica Simpson (I had a can of “chicken of the sea” for dinner the other night BTW) but Britney Spears has really made me question where America really prioritizes the news we hear about. What has she done to remind me yet again that America cares more about our blond pop-stars than it does about a War we need to end, the millions of people still displaced from disasters, or the Department of Defense’s multiple attempts to convince us we need another 1300 nuclear warheads?
Enter: Bald Britney Spears. The News has been almost impossible to watch this past weekend because every story was about how America’s dream child went to rehab yet again, quit after a day and then decided to shave her head and get some more tats. Sure, she can do what she wants with out me really caring, it’s always enjoyable to have a celebrity be absolutely bonkers. I do kind of hate it though when this is all people care about and talk about on the news. It is not news. It is something I will really enjoy watching being made fun of on Conan, Kimmel, Stewart and Colbert. Inside I secretly wish celebrities lose all their marbles and doing the dumbest things we can imagine, because it feeds the comedians. They love it, and I enjoy their shameless side-splitting jokes about it.
I guess the funniest thing about the whole event, was actually Britney WANTED the press and fans to be there. Everyone has been suckered by another celebrity catching the news stations off guard and praying for another spread in the Enquirer, Star, Globe, Examiner. Prepare to see that bald head every time you go to the gas station or grocery store check out lines. Which gives me a break from Tom, Angelina, Rosie, Donald, Oprah, Brad, etc etc. She needed another stint to be in more tabloids and be the center of our news. She did an amazing job of it to. Sure the Paparazzi follow her all the time, but why did she choose to shave her head PUBLIC? Decided against doing it at home? Be serious. She’s staring at the camera man in the picture above and is happy everyone is going to be obsessed with her yet-again. She’s doing the same thing every pop-star before her has done: Make money; get famous; do absolutely ridiculous stuff. In retrospect, I have to say she has done something right though, since here I am writing about how stupid she is, guess I have been duped.
You hear Anna Nicole died?
Brittany Spears - look at it from a psycological stand point - she has done things she is not proud of - when a person looks at themselves in the mirror they don’t like what they see. Subconciously she wanted to change that image not knowing that it comes from within and not from without. Rehab would try to change the inner self so that the outer self does not need to spend so much time trying to cover the inner up, aka, drinking and partying one’s self to death. If you don’t like yourself - no amount of new clothing, hair styles, tatoos, diamonds or cars will erase that for more than a few days.
But, it does give them the “look-at-me” capability for awhile.