anxiety asdfjkl;
I rarely get a decent night sleep these days. It seems when I am really tired and lethargic and make a concious decision to go to bed, THAT is the moment when I actually can’t sleep. My mind just starts going everywhere. Then . . the few creative cells I actually have seem more focused and clear. I start thinking of new designs and that I wish I actually had 24/7.
Music just starts coming to my head and I have to write it down or figure it out on my guitar. Lyrics to music come in the same fashion. Now that I am starting to get into photo-shop, with my basic understanding of it, random designs start flowing. I make a lot of my large and just general life decisions late at night most of the time. I eve write the majority of my e-mails late night.
I know many friends and family members that are the same way, at least in a similar fashion. Another thing I have is where strangely after waking up, I usually remember 2 - 5 dreams for the first hour or two of the day. Sometimes I wake up and find answers to the questions I was thinking about before I finally fell asleep, during that focused ‘a.d.d’ creative time. Dreaming is just an extension of the time I use thinking. I even wake up in the middle of the night, bust out the computer or a note pad and go crazy for 20 minutes writing letters or changing a song or writing something down I really want to remember then next day.
Usually, the only exception to this is when I am driving. Maybe I was a truck driver in a past life, but when I take long road trips, I think pretty clearly then too. This generally confuses me because I am focused a great deal on the actual driving part. I drive safer than I normally do when I am out on a long haul, focusing hard on it- and this side parallel thinking starts taking place where everything seems clear and easy like it does when I get anxious late at night.
Maybe it should be noted, that I am currently writing this at 2:22 AM. No, it is not fantastic writing or super creative. Everything else I am multi-tasking currently as I write is wicked awesome.
I am calling the image of the elephant with wings from a few posts ago, the “Elephant Fairy”. I want him on a t-shirt. I thought of the Elephant Fairy during one of these pesky late night moments.
Urban Lethargicism.